The Creative Mama » inspiring art, encouraging women

A Letter to My Unborn Baby

(Grateful to Deb Schwedhelm for my maternity photos.)

Sweet baby-to-be: In five weeks (or seven if you take after your brothers) you will arrive in this world. You are special. I know this now, and I have not even met you yet. You are our third child, but are already first in many ways.

You are our first “surprise.” I never thought my insatiable curiosity could withstand nine months of suspense, but I am enjoying this much more than I could have imagined. My mind wanders often, daydreaming of whether you will be my third son or first daughter. I am so eager for the moment of your birth, when you emerge from the warm tub of waters and answer the most pressing question I have known.

You will be the first to make your entrance in the comfort of our home and into my arms, minus a required time line or drive to a birth center. You will be surrounded by a relaxed mama and other gracious women — gentle midwives, loving doulas and perhaps your brothers (if they don’t drive your mama crazy–that negates the relaxed part). There is something primal and powerful and nostalgic about this. It is a rare experience in our modern society.

You will be our first baby to arrive while your daddy is away. This breaks all of our hearts, but I think his most of all. Sweet child, he will hold you for the first time when you are at least two months old, when some of the newness of you has faded and you are more of a baby. You will meet in a hangar bay surrounded by hues of reds, whites and blues. He will smell like oil and airplanes. His flight suit will wrap around your tiny body and he will hold you close. We will all cry–maybe you too? (At this stranger you do not yet know, but will love with all of your heart soon.) I look forward to this day and dream of this moment almost as much as your birth.

(Maternity photos courtesy of Deb Schwedhelm)

He departed when you were just beginning to blossom in my belly and carrying you as a “single mama” while taking care of your two young siblings has challenged and refined me in ways I never anticipated. You have made me more grateful for our strong family and more compassionate for women who must raise children on their own (with no daddy in sight)–and even to my own mother, who was a single parent for most of my life.

You may be the first to be the last…of sorts. We don’t think you are the last of our children, but it is quite possible that you may be the last baby I carry in my womb. This fills me with excitement and wistfulness all at once. You are the essence of bittersweet. I treasure the feeling of your movements and the blessing it is to grow a tiny life inside of me. When I am exhausted or achy,  I work harder at being thankful for the many reasons why I feel this way. I want to experience you fully, both the pleasures and pains. I yearn to remember these complex emotions and fleeting sensations with gratitude.

Little one, you don’t have a proper name yet, but I love you with all of my being. You are a blessing from God, even in your difficult timing. You have an eager family waiting for you…and you will be treasured and celebrated and admired. For all of these things my sweet, you are not the first, but the next–the next chapter of our humble family story as it unfolds. I would like to ask you to hurry–I am tired, and wobbly, and ready to meet you soon. Instead, I will wait patiently for you, enjoying you on the inside. Come as you are, my dearest son or daughter. And come when you are ready.

With every ounce of my heart,
Mama

———————–

I read another mother’s letters to her children a few years ago and loved the idea of documenting my family this way. It began with a “Letter to My Sons” and will continue each year on their birthdays (or at other special times). Have you written something similar? Or are you planning to write your own love letters to your little ones? Please share your links so we can enjoy them.

Co-editor Stephanie Beaty is a blessed mama of three children and military spouse. After a 10-year career as a professional writer/PR pro she began Lifeography, a modern child + family portrait studio where she focuses on capturing relationships and connections. Although her growing family currently resides in Virginia Beach, Va., home is wherever the Navy sends them. Write to her at hello@lifeographer.com.

About Stephanie


Stephanie Beaty is a blessed, homeschooling mama of four and military spouse. After a 10-year career as a professional writer/PR pro she began Lifeography, a modern child + family portrait studio where she focuses on capturing relationships and connections. Although her growing family currently resides in Tampa, Fla., home is wherever the Navy sends them.

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  • Stephanie

    This is the perfect summary of everything I have written to my unborn baby. I cried a little happy tear. My name’s Stephanie too, I’m also a professional writer (copywriting), and these are the words to my little human http://deardassie.wordpress.com/

  • Pingback: Letters For My Firstborn « WOMAN MEETS WORLD

  • http://jasminestewart87.wordpress.com Jasmine Stewart

    You are a special person and a great writer. Thank you for your inspiration. Stay courageous. I wish you and your family the best! God bless..

    (http://jasminestewart87.wordpress.com/2011/06/04/letters-fo-my-firstborn/)

    • http://jasminestewart87.wordpress.com Jasmine Stewart

      Correction in my blog link in previous comment: for*

      :)

  • Pingback: Letters For My Firstborn « WOMAN MEETS WORLD!

  • http://www.sampleletters.in/maternity-leave-letter.html/ Maternity leave letters

    All the best for you and the baby

  • http://www.staceywoodsphoto.com stacey woods

    i love your words, and i dearly love your heart. your children are blessed beyond compare to have you as their mother, leading them and teaching them how to love. xo

  • http://jenberry.com/blog jenberry

    makes me appreciate my own mama so much more for raising 3 of us all alone. thank you for this.

  • Philippa

    what a beautiful letter, i have something similar for my special little guy, blessed be on your home-birth i hope it is exactly what you are waiting for.

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  • http://shasta.blogsome.com gearhead mama

    What a beautiful letter. I, too, look forward to the story of this baby’s birth and the beautiful images that I am sure will follow.

    I used to write a monthly letter to my eldest on my blog, but it became too much when my second was born. So I tried to do it yearly, but haven’t even managed to keep up with that! I like the previous poster’s idea of doing it by hand and adding a few pictures. I think I will see if I can do that, because I know so many things will be lost to me as the months and years go by.

    One of my favorite letters is one I wrote to my second child, of the story of her birth (also a homebirth). It was such an amazing experience, and I wanted to make sure I got it down as soon as possible, so I wouldn’t forget any of the details. You can read it here:
    http://shasta.blogsome.com/2008/05/03/sophia/

    Sending lots of well wishes to you in these last weeks. I imagine this time is joyful, but also bittersweet since your husband can’t be with you.

  • http://www.melissadeakin.com melissa deakin

    this is absolutely amazing.
    your words are so incredible and paired with the images…just breathtaking.
    i wish you many blessings for a speedy and ‘as-comfortable-as possible’ delivery.

  • http://www.pinkletoes.com Michele (Pinkle Toes)

    Tears. Tears. I pray for a safe and happy birth for you. I would give anything if it were possible for me to be there to capture that special day for your family. I’m so excited for you, my friend!

  • http://www.lifeographer.com Stephanie

    Just wanted to offer a heartfelt THANK YOU for all of your kind sentiments–and for sharing your own stories. I adore this dynamic community of women and am thrilled to be able to dialogue with you. xoxoxo, stephanie

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  • Michelle

    My mom did this for me after i arrived. She kept kind of a diary of from when the got me( I’m adopted, from 1week old) till i was about 2 years old. She wrote every day at first then it spaced out some more, it was a diary, but written as if she was talking to me. She saved them & gave them to me on my 21st birthday, and i never knew she had done this till i received them. I treasure those notebooks soo much, i cant even describe how precious they are or all the lil & bigg things i have gained from them. what you’re doing is wonderful, & i hope your children get as much from them as i did from my mom’s :)

  • http://seekingequipoise.com Hannah

    Thank you for sharing your heart here. This brought tears to my eyes. You have such a beautiful soul. Your children are so blessed to have you as their mama, and I am sure your new little one will cherish this letter one day.

  • http://www.fermorblondet.shutterfly.com Amalia Blondet

    Ahhh, the tears.. fresh, and at the office!!! What a lovely letter. I’ve written letters to both my babies from the womb and for each birthday or important milestone.

    I find them incredible to read, and we’ve read them aloud several times. Its a testament to my feelings for them through every single step in their upbringing and I am sure they will cherish them forever.

    I hope everything goes well for the remaining of your pregnancy, and that you enjoy your first two months with him/her, but that those two months go by quickly, so you can all be reuninted as a family.

    All my love and prayers for your family and for you!!!!!

    Amalia

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  • http://www.503photography.com Jessica

    First, thank you for your vulnerabity. Second, you look amazing pregnant! So, so beautiful.

    When we got paired up with an expecting birth mom I wrote letters to our daughter just as if we were expecting, but different. Now that she’s here I have continued to write her. I’m planning on writing occasionally – whenever I feel led – making the letters and pictures into a book and giving it to her when she’s older (maybe her 18th birthday?). I feel as if this is something that will always help her feel grounded as an adopted child.

    Thanks for the continued inspiration.

  • Jennifer

    At least I’m not the only mushpot with tears in her eyes. LOL

    I had my first child, a son, last October. Every month on the 6th (the day he was born), I write a note in a journal for him, and add 2 photos from the day. It’s a big deal for me, because I type almost everything, but I want him to be able to look back when he is older and see his mom’s handwriting. (I know what it means to me to see my grandmother’s handwriting)

    Sometimes I talk about him and his life, what’s going on, what he’s learned to do so far. I talk about what’s going on with our family, a little of what’s going on in the world, and sometimes I talk about what I want for him in the future, what kind of man I wish for him to be, and what kind of mom I want to be. I just want him to know himself, and where he came from a little better. And I want him to have documented proof of just how much his mama loves him.

    Congratulations and best of luck to you all!

  • http://erincobb.com/thepigbear erin cobb

    Absolutely, breathtakingly beautiful. There is nothing more poignant or powerful than family history in the making.

    On the night before I gave birth to my son, our second child, I wrote a letter to my daughter. It remains one of my most popular blog posts:

    http://erincobb.com/ThePigBear/?p=326

  • http://confessionsofcityeater.blogspot.com/ Stephanie

    This is such a beautiful post. The way you described meeting daddy for the first time gave my goosebumps.

  • Tammy Waida

    That was beautiful. Thank you for sharing your intimate thoughts with us.

  • http://www.mommygoesgreen.com Tiffany

    Just beautiful ( with tears in my eyes ). My husband travels for work every week and during that time while I’m raising two babies on my own, I am so grateful that it’s not permanent. Since the first time I felt the flutter of my daughter in my belly, I have written (sent emails to myself to compile into a book later) letters to my children with my feelings, thoughts, their accomplishments, funny moments and anything I want to treasure forever. It’s as much for them as it is for me. Thank you for sharing.

  • http://www.bakedbree.com Bree

    Tears. Beautifully written. I had a third “surprise”as well and it was better than any Christmas morning I have ever had.

  • http://www.jennyfenig.com Jenny Fenig

    Absolutely gorgeous, Stephanie! Thank you for sharing such heartfelt, deep emotions. I’m thrilled for the journey you are on … and can just imagine the JOY your FULL family will feel once your husband returns and greets his new child for the first time. Wow.

    I am expecting my second child in April and am very much leaning towards a home birth. The way you describe it makes it that much more appealing to me. Thank you for opening me up to the possibilities.

  • http://vanessawashburn.blogspot.com/ Vanessa

    lovely, thank you for sharing.

  • http://www.Nicoletaylorphoto.com Nicole

    Stephanie, this is so beautiful! It brought tears to my eyes.
    I keep a journal for both of my boys and write letters to them in it often. Tracking their cute phrases, letting them know how crazy they drove me that day, but how much I still love them, every little thought and detail that I can.
    I only hope they grow to cherish them in adulthood as I cherish them in motherhood!

    Many blessings to you and good luck with the rest of your pregnancy! How exciting! ! ! !

  • http://shuttergirl-photography.com Beverly Clark

    Beautiful, there is a tear in my eye. As a retired military spouse, my heart goes out to you. Can’t wait to see the photos from their first “meeting!”

  • http://www.angiewarren.com Angie

    Stephanie you’re a beautiful soul, and an amazing mama. Your little one is coming into such a loving family, I’m sure *I’ll* soon be dreaming of the day you get to re-unite with that daddy who loves you all so. Looking forward to seeing the photos! Have a fantastic day dear :)

  • http://www.penn-fam.blogspot.com Missy June

    I write a letter to my children each birthday.

  • Amy

    Ok beautiful Stephanie…. That totally made me cry and I don’t even have kids. It’s going to be a pile of mush around here by noon.

  • http://www.brookechambers.blogspot.com Brooke Chambers

    That is so beautiful (letter and photos). I’m due in 4wks (4th boy), so it definitely brought tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for sharing and inspiring.

  • nicky

    I read alot of blogs and hardly ever leave a comment. As a military spouse of a pilot this touched a raw spot. Such beautiful words from such a strong woman. Congratultions and thanks for sharing this with us!